Arod only tips waitresses 15%

Ok, so this is what is known or "kinda-known" about Arod a/k/a Alex Rodriguez.

*May have taken steroids while in high school. (Showing a willingness to be a human petri dish at a very young age.)

*Has admitted to taking steroids from 2001 to 2003 because things were "loosey goosey" back then. ( Admits taking illegal substances but only when confronted with leaked positive tests despite earlier adamant denials. Weasel-like tendencies here.)

*May have taken steroids with the Yankees after 2004 when they were banned by Major League Baseball. (Now,your cheating, man. As Archie Bunker once said to Meathead "You are a person of very little quality")

*At his best when his team is up by 10 runs. (Not exactly a clutch performer.)

* Teammates have nicknamed him "The Cooler" because teams turn cold when he arrives and heat up after he leaves. (Can be proven but more importantly shows he has no friends.)

*Reportedly fainted during the birth of his most recent daughter. (Oh, come on, man!)

*Openly dated body-builder ladies and other assorted bimbos while married and with a newborn at home. (Degenerating into"low form of life" behavior.)

*Followed an aging Madonna around like a puppy dog. (Where to start?)

Now MAYBE you could overlook all of this but now it comes out in Selena Roberts' new book "A-Rod" that the man of the hour here only tips waitresses at Hooters 15%!

15 PERCENT?!

(Stunned silence)

I can just see it. "Hey honey, more wings right over here. Don't worry, I will take care of you." Along with a wink and all the while, running her ragged.

Does he have a tip calculator card in his wallet? Does he round up to the nearest dollar?

Arod, you will never survive THIS ONE. Mark my words! Just forget it! Hell hath no fury like a waitress scorned.

15%!

Dude, it's over. (You watch)