Suzyn Waldman

 

On this date in 2005, Suzyn Waldman becomes the first woman to be a full-time color commentator in major league history.

"Roger Clemens is in George's box and Roger Clemens is coming back! Oh, my goodness gracious! Of all the dramatic things I've ever seen! Roger Clemens is standing right in George Steinbrenner's box announcing he is back! Roger Clemens is a New York Yankee!" 

Roger Clemens

On this date in 1986, Roger Clemens wins the AL Cy Young Award unanimously.

"I wish he (Hank Aaron) was still playing. I'd probably crack his head open to show him how valuable I was." - after Hank Aaron commented that pitchers should not be allowed to win the MVP Award

Pedro Martinez

On this date in 1997, Pedro Martinez of the Expos wins the NL Cy Young Award after posting a 17-8 record, 305 strikeouts, a 1.90 ERA and 13 complete games.

"What really catches your eye is how small he is. You go up against Roger Clemens, even if you've never seen him before, and you say, 'This guy looks overpowering.' You wouldn't say that with Pedro Martinez." - Mark Lemke 

Roger Clemens

On this date in 2000, Roger Clemens throws a barrel of a shattered bat in the direction of Mike Piazza in Game Two of the World Series.

"I thought the broken bat was a ball."

Roger Clemens

On this date in 2000, Roger Clemens throws the barrel of a shattered bat in the direction of Mike Piazza in Game Two of the World Series.

"I thought the broken bat was a ball."

Roger Clemens seems a little bored to me

 

Maybe he should start a video game company.

States give you free money for that, you know.

Ok but he still goes to jail for having frosted tips as a forty-some year-old

Separate charges!

Roger Clemens

On this date in 1984, Roger Clemens earns his first major league victory as the Red Sox beat the Twins 5-4.

"I wish he (Hank Aaron) was still playing. I'd probably crack his head open to show him how valuable I was." - after Hank Aaron commented that pitchers should not be allowed to win the MVP Award

The judge in the Roger Clemens trial warned the jurors to stay off MySpace!

"Ok judge, that will be absolutely no problem! Should we avoid shopping at Woolworth's too?"

Suzyn Waldman

On this date in 2005, Suzyn Waldman becomes the first woman to be a full-time color commentator in major league history.

"Roger Clemens is in George's box and Roger Clemens is coming back! Oh, my goodness gracious! Of all the dramatic things I've ever seen! Roger Clemens standing right in George Steinbrenner's box announcing he is back! Roger Clemens is a New York Yankee!"

Roger Clemens

On this date in 2000, Roger Clemens was fined $50,000 for throwing the jagged barrel of a shattered bat in the direction of Mets catcher Mike Piazza in Game Two of the World Series.

"I thought the broken bat was a ball."

Profound clubhouse thoughts

"He doesn't leave anything on the field." - John Farrell on Ricky Romero

1 star out of 5 on the "cliche-meter": Not like that one time the grounds crew went out there after Roger Clemens pitched and found needles!

Roger Clemens

Born on today's date, Roger Clemens.

"I think he may have misremembered" - at Congressional Hearing regarding a conversation Andy Petitte said they had regarding steroids

I don't know if Clemens is going to get off or not

But since he already pitched in Toronto around these people, jail seems kind of redundant.

You haul him back before Congress

Ask him the same questions.

He gives the same answers.

You prosecute a completely new action against him.

Forget about asking the judge to resurrect this one.

Where's the flaw?

Who needs law school?

Hey, can I get one of those Florida juries?!

11 home runs n September?!

I wouldn't cut it either!

Hey, Billy Ray Cyrus sold a kabillion records wearing one of those!

I also know this. If Roger Clemens had one of these, he would not be in court right now.

I don't know if hair extensions would bring the same mojo but at this point, I would give it a try.

Remember that infected abscess removed from Rogers Clemens' ......um posterior?

Testing found Jose Canseco and Rusty Hardin's DNA in there.

Brave new world.

"Aw, come on now!"

"They can't send Roger to jail because Andy Pettitte 'misremembered'!

No way!

How would you like to go to jail for misremembering?

Dismembering maybe.

Misremembering, no!

Go over the Constitution with a fine tooth comb.

There's gotta be something in there!"

Suzyn Waldman