Carlos Zambrano

On this date in 2008, Carlos Zambrano throws a no-hitter in the Cubs 5-0 victory over the Astros.

"I was the one who threw the no-hitter, you know, not MLB." - on why he declined to donate the game ball to the Hall of Fame

Carlos Zambrano

On this date in 2008, Carlos Zambrano throws a no-hitter in the Cubs 5-0 victory over the Brewers.

"I was the one who threw the no-hitter, you know, not MLB." - on why he declined to donate the game ball to the Hall of Fame

Carlos Zambrano

Born on today's date, Carlos Zambrano.

"My crazy times are over." - May 31, 2006

An additional benefit for Zambrano

His anger management classes are waived now that he is with "anger manager"!

The Marlins trade for Carlos Zambrano

Do they send him for a physical or to a shrink before they confirm?

(You gotta admit, that "face" ain't right)

Cubs GM Jim Hendry fired?!

749-748 wining record!

Signed Carlos Zambrano and Alfonso Soriano!

Got Cubs icon Ryne Sandberg pissed at the organization!

Bleachers less than full!

Can't please anybody!

Carlos just quit!

Says he's retired.

That guy that rushed by with the paperwork and pen? The Cubs GM.

Called his wife and told her not to wait up.

The ESPN guys just reported that....

....Carlos Zambrano ripped their closer, Carlos Marmol for blowing the save today.

ALWAYS WORKS!

Carlos Zambrano

Born on today's date, Carlos Zambrano.

"My crazy times are over." - May 31, 2006

Photographers talking

"How come you are just standing here like a zombie? We need pictures for the paper tomorrow! Are you high again?!"

"I am waiting for Zambrano to stand just right and throw the ball near the "W" so it integrates the wall design for a curve ball look."

"Give me a break! Dude you spent too much time in art school! Time means money. Get some shots! Ok? You are wasting your time with this art stuff! This is a business!"

Click

Lobotomy? No? Then what?

Carrie Muskat at mlb.com reports via twitter the following:

"Cubs announce Carlos Zambrano on ML restricted list starting Tues and will start treatment Wed."

Ummm Cubs hello!

Those kind of hospitals closed some time ago! That's why you see those people on the streets wandering around with tin cans and demanding to clean your windshield at red lights.

He probably needs more than out-patient here so I think you might be "stuck".

Not buying it! Sorry!

Gordon Wittenmeyer of the Chicago Sun Times reports that the suspended Carlos Zambrano says that Friday's dugout explosion was "completely misunderstood" and blames Derrek Lee for the incident.

"All he wanted to do was pump the team up" said a Zambrano source when apparently Derrek Lee rudely interrupted him in the middle of his inspirational speech.*

Of course, anybody who saw the video knows this is laughable.

Sources also told Wittenmeyer that Zambranos' rant, much of it in Spanish, included him screaming "This team is horses---!"

Maybe but you can't say it. Especially with a 5.66 ERA.

Aren't guaranteed contracts great?

*Who is this guy's agent? This is not helping one bit if you ask me.

Well it was fun while it lasted

Last night, Jason Heyward 0-4 with 4 strikeouts. Two hits in his last 16 at bats with 8 strikeouts.

It's been discovered that (for now) he can't hit low and away breaking stuff.

Scouts - gotta love em.

Zambrano just pitched to him on the wrong day. Probably pretty pissed now.

If I was an Ebay seller, I would end all those auctions early to beat the bid retractions.

This guy says one of his pitchers is out of shape?!

"We've got to get him in a little better shape here first, and we will, especially if the weather stays like this."

"I'm not disappointed about anything. We recognize that we're going to get him in a little better conditioning and he's going to work hard."

Lou Piniella on Carlos Silva per Bruce Miles of the Daily Herald (Suburban Chicago).

What's he gonna do next?

Tell Carlos Zambrano that he's too hot-headed?

Zambrano threatens to quit

Per Paul Sullivan of the Chicago Tribune, Carlos Zambrano says he will retire at the end of next year if he has another season like 2009. Zambrano also apparently insisted that he was serious.

"Look, this is the only season I haven't won 16 or 18 or 14 games. If it happens again next season, two seasons in a row, I'll quit. I just have to put this behind me."

I am guessing that he has a marketable secondary skill that will keep him occupied in the event that this contingency plan comes into play.

I trust that he knows what he is doing. He has probably been thinking about his options for next year for some time which among other things would include:

1. Win the World Series with the Cubs and be a World Series contributor and star. Be a hero in Chicago forever.
2. Do not win at least 14 games and quit.

I am sure that he has thought this out rationally and this is not just some spur-of-the-moment kind of thing. Otherwise, he would have no credibility the next time he opens his mouth and I am sure he has thought of that.

Ok, Carlos. No problem.

Words have meaning, you know and we are going to hold you to this.

Just so you know.

There sure seems to be a lot of "harassment" going on with the Cubs

Per umpbump.com, Carlos Zambrano sure didn't like that recent column by Carol Slezak of the Chicago Sun-Times.

"That lady that says I was lazy, I want to see her on Tuesday," Zambrano said. "I want to be with no shirt so that she can see my body (it gets better), and she can see what type of body I have. If I'm lazy, lazy people do not have this body, so I'm going to show her my guns so that she can call me lazy again."

It is not known if Ms. Slezak showed up for the inspection.

Ok, we know these things about the Cubs:

1. Milton Bradley alleges that he experiences racial harassment regularly on the premises.

2. Carol Slezak has been issued an invitation from a Cubs player to meet him so to show off body parts which could develop into a sexual harassment situation.

3. Lou Pinella is a known serial harasser of umpires.

There sure seems to be a lot of "harassment" going on at Wrigley Field these days.

Do the Cubs have an HR Department or an In-House legal staff there?

Just wondering.